Silly

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haha oh my god. my pw is suffering. im getting withdrawal symptoms from bof already. weeeeeeeeeeeeeee... ji hoo omg AHHH he's damn sweet. but in dramas, the good guys always finish last.. so sad.. but ill root for him even though that ugly curly guy ARG :@ i hate him!! (and xueer too for picking him) argg!!!!!!!!! here's a picture to express my anger HAHAHHA



this is too funny lol. okay :D:D:D i hope you like tht xueer!!

anyways today's go karting was fun!!! hahaha. but two rounds only, wanna smack someone already -__-!!!!!!!!! but the driving is cool i think.. i want to do it again :D hahaha and i can't believe they actually set it up in the school parking lot... hilarious, i thought it was a joke HAHAHAHA. xueer cut me but its cause my engine died kay!!! lol :D

anyways we skipped the dancing stuff and went off to eat and watch the movie, my sister's keeper. it doesn't really feel like a movie though.. but more of a story? i don't know how to describe it, i think it's nice though.... the flashbacks were kind of confusing but i think we generally understood the order... hahaha.

the part that stuck out the most to me was the scene where the sick daughter (forgot the name) with cancer was already on the verge of dying and the close family & relatives came to visit her. the relatives began advising her to think positively i.e. talking to the cancer cells and asking them to go away, basically just trying to build up her hope for recovery by saying stuff like "miracles do happen" and "if you really really believe it, it really does work"..... the close family (the mom, dad, sis, bro, aunt) were very quiet and just nodded along yeah. haha i wanted them to just stand up and scream at them .. as if a miracle would happen if you wished for it, as if a fatal illness can just dissapear if you wished for it. the close family was quiet, you know why? cuz they know its damn well pointless to bother hoping for a spectacular miracle that would make their loved one normal again.. there's really nothing left to do but just cry and get over it. it's really saddening, but really, what else can you do? so cliche but death happens. what really hurts is how the relatives don't even realize how much pain their words can cause, how can you tell someone that they're going to get better when they're not? how can you tell a daughter that their parent won't die, how can you promise that? it's one thing to be frustrated about not having any control over the illness but its another thing for other people to tell you that you DO have control, when you don't......... but you can't hate them for doing that... they probably do want to help from the bottom of their hearts.... but they're just not thinking right because they've never experienced something like it before, but hey, lucky them...

it's all very sad yeah... and i want to mention something also. to L. it's so stupid but i'm going to say it anyways. i don't care that you don't want any pity but i really, truly am sorry for you and your family. and wish you the greatest condolences one can possibly wish for another person. i'm sorry that i'm writing this here, but i'd feel awkward if i tell this to you on msn LET ALONE in person. coping mechanisms are killer, and i really hope you don't choose the wrong ones, but it seems like you're doing okay. but you have a thing for superficial happiness, right? just know.. everything that does happen, does happen for a reason, and don't come out of the situation any worse than what you are now... inevitable... a word i wish could be erased from the world, yet again showing that what you wish for doesn't always happen huh :P life is cruel.. but make the best of it :)

this was a stupid post.. but whatever :)